In this episode Joshua Bevan learns from a group of evolutionary psychologists why fear and stress is a reflex when we are presented with an embarrassing situation.
If you liked that video, check out another video where I learn to face my irrational fears.
Why does embarrassment cause stress?
Hey, Joshua Bevan here, learning how to earn all I can, save all I can, so I can give all I can.
I read an article written by a group of evolutionary psychologists that really helped me put some of my fears into perspective.
We all know about the Fight or Flight response, right? It was developed over time to help me when I’m in physical danger. When the lion starts charging me, I’ve got to gear my body up to protect myself.
I’ve got to choose between pulling out my spear and killing the lion, or running as fast as I can and hoping to get away.
That makes sense…but here’s the really interesting part:
In the world I live in, I’m not presented with physical threats very often. My life is rarely in that kind of danger. Yet my body still gears up. I get that stress response.
My heart starts racing, pupils dilate, heavy breathing, digestion shuts down.
But all of this happens when I’m “just” about to talk to a new person or stand on stage in front of many people. There’s no physical danger here. The worst thing that can happen is that I can embarrass myself.
Embarrassment? So what? What does my tribal hunter/gathering ancestor care about embarrassment?
Ah-ha! But he does! You see back, then my survival is all based within the tribe. If I did something that was socially unacceptable, the rest of the tribe would punish me.
Watch. Say I was foolish enough to put on my best loincloth and seduce the chief’s woman. We sneak off and make passionate love on the bear skin rug.
Now when the chief walks into the wig-wam, he’s going to be pissed. He and all of his homeboys are going to beat me up and leave me in the jungle- all alone.
I’m all alone in the jungle. I’m not going to survive. My genes aren’t going to be passed on…
Now let’s take it a step further. What if the whole tribe is trying to figure out where to find the best hunting area.
I stand up in front of everyone and tell them my idea. But they all think my speech was lame and my idea sucks. They all laugh, and I’m embarrassed.
If I present embarrassing ideas over and over again, the tribe won’t accept me anymore. They will leave me alone to die.
To our ancestors, embarrassment equals death.
But do us, it doesn’t. That’s what we have to remember. In the embarrassing moment, I know it feels like you’re facing death.
But when it’s over, we can all look bath and laugh. Tell me about your most embarrassing moment, one where you thought you were facing death. Leave a comment below or post a message on Facebook.
I’ll see you later, have more fun!
- Act at the Speed of Instruction
- Stop Settling for Average
- Unconditional Positivity
- How to Promote Your Business with a Blog
First visit? Play this video!
While building his businesses from the ground up, Joshua Bevan sought out some of the best mentorship. He has learned that the path to success is difficult and simple at the same time. Joshua has committed his life to learning how to, “Earn all you can. Save all you can. Give all you can.” Through videos, blogs and speaking events, he will pass that knowledge forward.